I don't know why it is, but it seems as if the FX Network can only air terrible movies. It's the type of movie that is a big budget flop or a straight to DVD-sequel.... Heavy with action, sex appeal, special effects, and let me stress, terrible acting! Sure I've sat down from time-to-time to catch one of these terrible movies, which is why I had to make a list of the Worst FX Movies!!! So here we go off the top of my head, 20 terrible movies I've caught on FX! This one goes out to you Pablo!!
Honorable Mention: Pearl Harbor, 13 Going on 30, Stepford Wives, The Rundown, Walking Tall
20. Butterfly Effect: Ashton Kutcher, Amy Smart
-May have worked if they found someone beside Ashton to play the lead
19. Any Given Sunday: Jamie Foxx, LL Cool J, Dennis Quaid
-Flat out ridiculous! Especially when a guy looses his eyeball on the field and chases after it!
18. Elektra: Jennifer Garner, Ben Affleck
-Who the hell is Elektra??
17. SWAT: Colin Ferrel, LL Cool J, Samuel Jackson
-It was one of those movies so lame, that you almost wanted to root for the bad guys!
16. Deep Blue Sea: Thomas Jane, LL Cool J, Samuel Jackson
-Samuel Jackson gets eaten by a shark! 'Nough said...
15. Day After Tomorrow: Dennis Quaid, Jake Gylenhall
-Cool Special effects, but that was really about it...
14. Into the Blue: Paul Walker, Jessica Alba
-Sex Appeal, yes... Acting, 'fraid not!
13 Chronicles of Riddick: Vin Diesel
-Ladies and Gentlemen: Vin Diesel!!
12. The Fast and the Furious: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker
-Sure, if street racing is your thing... not mine though!
11. The Punisher: Thomas Jane, John Travolta
-Not even Travolta could save this destined big-budget-flop
10. Triple xXx: Vin Diesel, Samuel Jackson
-A bad ass James Bond; could have worked if the acting wasn't so terrible
9. Paycheck: Ben Affleck, Uma Thurman
-Weak Plot, added with Affleck's flat effect
8. Daredevil: Ben Affleck, Colin Ferrel, Jennifer Garner
-Was this an superhero action film or a comedy?
7. Phone Booth: Colin Ferrel, Forest Whittaker
-The entire movie takes place in a Phone Booth... need I say more!
6. Transporter: Jason Statham
-The essence of FX: awesome chase scenes, huge explosions, and terrible acting!
5. Poseidon: Josh Lucas, Kurt Russell
-this big budget film was nothing more than a big headache to watch
4. 2 Fast 2 Furious: Paul Walker, Tyrese Gibson
-I cannot stand Tyrese Gibson as an actor!!
3. xXx: State of the Union: Ice Cube, Samuel Jackson
-We get it Ice Cube... You are a bad ass mother fucker... now please stop making terrible movies!
2. Hulk: Eric Bana, Josh Lucas
-Who were they kidding... thank god for Edward Norton to the rescue!
1. The Pacifer: Vin Diesel
-Diesel reached a new low with this Disney action movie... An ass-kicking baby-sitter... Wow!
Possible Future FX Movies:
Stealth, Crank, Ghost Rider, Death Race, Miami Vice, Fast and Furious, Snakes on a Plane, Black Snake Moan, Doom, Gridiron Gang
One Thing I noticed as I made this list, was that many of these actors seem to repeatedly make terrible FX Movies... So here's a little Bonus... My list of top 10 FX Actors!!!
Honorable Mention: Jessica Alba, Jamie Foxx, Jennifer Garner, Ice Cube, Thomas Jane, Ashton Kutcher, Dennis Quaid
10. Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson- now here is an up-and-comer in the FX world... a bad-ass-kicking terrible actor... he'll do great! (The Rundown, Walking Tall, Doom)
9. Josh Lucas- I thought after I saw him in "Beautiful Mind" he would be great... I was wrong (Hulk, Poseidon, Stealth)
8. Amy Smart- Has potential but keeps picking bad movies (Butterfly Effect, Peaceful Warrior, Crank)
7. Jason Statham- He kicked ass as "Turkish" but that's been about it (Transporter 1-2-3, Crank, Death Race, War)
6. Samuel Jackson- Samuel is just a bad-ass, one of the hardest working men in the business... Yet even his stellar performance in Pulp Fiction or his role as Mace Windu could not save him from making this list... Sure if you've done as many movies as him your bound to make some bad ones... But this many?? Comon Sammy! Maybe you should just stop yelling in all your movies! (Deep Blue Sea, xXx, SWAT, xXx: State of the Union, The Man, Snakes on a Plane, Black Snake Moan, Jumper, etc!!!)
5. Paul Walker- He is nothing but a teen idol for high school girls... thats sadly about it (The Fast and the Furious, Into the Blue, Eight Below, 2 Fast 2 Furious)
4. Colin Ferrel- Now here is a hit or miss actor... He's done some really amazing movies like, Tigerland, Alexander, New World, and Minorty Report yet has also disappointed in many (SWAT, Phone Booth, Daredevil, Miami Vice)
3. LL Cool J- let me just say this... Rappers should not act! (Deep Blue Sea, SWAT, Any Given Sunday, Rollerball)
2. Ben Affleck- The thing that makes Affleck so terrible, is that he just has such a flat effect... I don't know what it is, but he always seems to turn possible good movies into terrible movies... He almost even ruined "Shakespeare in Love" with his very few lines...
(Reindeer Games, Pearl Harbor, Paycheck, Gigli, Daredevil, Jersey Girl, Elektra, Smoking Aces)
1. Vin Diesel- the epitome of FX Movies.... I don't think I've ever seen a good lead role out of Diesel... Sorry Vin but maybe you should just quit before the list gets longer (Pitch Black, Fast and the Furious, xXx, A Man Apart, Chronicles of Riddick, The Pacifer, Find Me Guilty)
Okay so thats it... My Rant about Terrible FX Movies... Let me know if you would add any others to the list!
Honorable Mention: Pearl Harbor, 13 Going on 30, Stepford Wives, The Rundown, Walking Tall
20. Butterfly Effect: Ashton Kutcher, Amy Smart
-May have worked if they found someone beside Ashton to play the lead
19. Any Given Sunday: Jamie Foxx, LL Cool J, Dennis Quaid
-Flat out ridiculous! Especially when a guy looses his eyeball on the field and chases after it!
18. Elektra: Jennifer Garner, Ben Affleck
-Who the hell is Elektra??
17. SWAT: Colin Ferrel, LL Cool J, Samuel Jackson
-It was one of those movies so lame, that you almost wanted to root for the bad guys!
16. Deep Blue Sea: Thomas Jane, LL Cool J, Samuel Jackson
-Samuel Jackson gets eaten by a shark! 'Nough said...
15. Day After Tomorrow: Dennis Quaid, Jake Gylenhall
-Cool Special effects, but that was really about it...
14. Into the Blue: Paul Walker, Jessica Alba
-Sex Appeal, yes... Acting, 'fraid not!
13 Chronicles of Riddick: Vin Diesel
-Ladies and Gentlemen: Vin Diesel!!
12. The Fast and the Furious: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker
-Sure, if street racing is your thing... not mine though!
11. The Punisher: Thomas Jane, John Travolta
-Not even Travolta could save this destined big-budget-flop
10. Triple xXx: Vin Diesel, Samuel Jackson
-A bad ass James Bond; could have worked if the acting wasn't so terrible
9. Paycheck: Ben Affleck, Uma Thurman
-Weak Plot, added with Affleck's flat effect
8. Daredevil: Ben Affleck, Colin Ferrel, Jennifer Garner
-Was this an superhero action film or a comedy?
7. Phone Booth: Colin Ferrel, Forest Whittaker
-The entire movie takes place in a Phone Booth... need I say more!
6. Transporter: Jason Statham
-The essence of FX: awesome chase scenes, huge explosions, and terrible acting!
5. Poseidon: Josh Lucas, Kurt Russell
-this big budget film was nothing more than a big headache to watch
4. 2 Fast 2 Furious: Paul Walker, Tyrese Gibson
-I cannot stand Tyrese Gibson as an actor!!
3. xXx: State of the Union: Ice Cube, Samuel Jackson
-We get it Ice Cube... You are a bad ass mother fucker... now please stop making terrible movies!
2. Hulk: Eric Bana, Josh Lucas
-Who were they kidding... thank god for Edward Norton to the rescue!
1. The Pacifer: Vin Diesel
-Diesel reached a new low with this Disney action movie... An ass-kicking baby-sitter... Wow!
Possible Future FX Movies:
Stealth, Crank, Ghost Rider, Death Race, Miami Vice, Fast and Furious, Snakes on a Plane, Black Snake Moan, Doom, Gridiron Gang
One Thing I noticed as I made this list, was that many of these actors seem to repeatedly make terrible FX Movies... So here's a little Bonus... My list of top 10 FX Actors!!!
Honorable Mention: Jessica Alba, Jamie Foxx, Jennifer Garner, Ice Cube, Thomas Jane, Ashton Kutcher, Dennis Quaid
10. Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson- now here is an up-and-comer in the FX world... a bad-ass-kicking terrible actor... he'll do great! (The Rundown, Walking Tall, Doom)
9. Josh Lucas- I thought after I saw him in "Beautiful Mind" he would be great... I was wrong (Hulk, Poseidon, Stealth)
8. Amy Smart- Has potential but keeps picking bad movies (Butterfly Effect, Peaceful Warrior, Crank)
7. Jason Statham- He kicked ass as "Turkish" but that's been about it (Transporter 1-2-3, Crank, Death Race, War)
6. Samuel Jackson- Samuel is just a bad-ass, one of the hardest working men in the business... Yet even his stellar performance in Pulp Fiction or his role as Mace Windu could not save him from making this list... Sure if you've done as many movies as him your bound to make some bad ones... But this many?? Comon Sammy! Maybe you should just stop yelling in all your movies! (Deep Blue Sea, xXx, SWAT, xXx: State of the Union, The Man, Snakes on a Plane, Black Snake Moan, Jumper, etc!!!)
5. Paul Walker- He is nothing but a teen idol for high school girls... thats sadly about it (The Fast and the Furious, Into the Blue, Eight Below, 2 Fast 2 Furious)
4. Colin Ferrel- Now here is a hit or miss actor... He's done some really amazing movies like, Tigerland, Alexander, New World, and Minorty Report yet has also disappointed in many (SWAT, Phone Booth, Daredevil, Miami Vice)
3. LL Cool J- let me just say this... Rappers should not act! (Deep Blue Sea, SWAT, Any Given Sunday, Rollerball)
2. Ben Affleck- The thing that makes Affleck so terrible, is that he just has such a flat effect... I don't know what it is, but he always seems to turn possible good movies into terrible movies... He almost even ruined "Shakespeare in Love" with his very few lines...
(Reindeer Games, Pearl Harbor, Paycheck, Gigli, Daredevil, Jersey Girl, Elektra, Smoking Aces)
1. Vin Diesel- the epitome of FX Movies.... I don't think I've ever seen a good lead role out of Diesel... Sorry Vin but maybe you should just quit before the list gets longer (Pitch Black, Fast and the Furious, xXx, A Man Apart, Chronicles of Riddick, The Pacifer, Find Me Guilty)
Okay so thats it... My Rant about Terrible FX Movies... Let me know if you would add any others to the list!
2 comments:
come on ghost ridr and nicholas cage should be on that list.
Outside of Lord of War what movie has he made recently worth a damn. Next? National Treasure? That bangkok movie.
Jamie foxx is either awesome or fuckin terrible!!!! Soloist has potential.
And I forgive Colin Ferrell. You have to watch In Brugges it ight just be the best foreign movie of the year. I would give him an oscar nod.
ahh "Ghost Rider" made honorable mention man... i like Nick Cage way too much to put him on the list!! as for Colin ferrel definitely was a tough one... still gotta see "In Burges" tho!
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